Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
