Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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