Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Randomize
