"it" just moved
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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