The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
