I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
