I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
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