Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize