Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Randomize