Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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