new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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