all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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