im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
