THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Randomize
