Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Randomize
