I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
