So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize