She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
