Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Randomize
