North Korea, Best Korea!
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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