Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
