Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
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