We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Why did my mother make you get naked?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
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