batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
