god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize