That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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