Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
