maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
