now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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