were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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