this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
