It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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