i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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