hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
