I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
