Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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