We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
