I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
