Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Apparently you make a good broom.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
