More tranny stories later!
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
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