I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
