Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Randomize
