I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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