I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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