I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Randomize