Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
