I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
