I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
