i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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