What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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