Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
my sisters under your porch take her home
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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