So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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